Help I’ve Fallen and I Can’t Get Up

AO: cruelhall
Q: Tinkertoy
PAX: Matador, Works for a Guy, Esposa, Kraut, Pedialyte, Harry Caray, Focker, Pound Puppy
FNGs: None
COUNT: 8
CONDITIONS: Optimal at 56*

WARMUP:
Dynamic: mosey/toy soldier/donkey kick/side lunge.
Static: GMs/bow to ground/hand to sky/broga/squat to straight leg

THE THANG:
3 rounds
-30 step ups (15 each leg)
-lunge down
-mosey back
Hold plank until all in or go for an extra round

3 rounds
-25 chair squats
-low prisoner walk down
-mosey back
Hold plank until all in or go for an extra round

3 rounds
-20 pistol squats (10 each leg)
-side lunge down
-mosey back
Hold plank until all in or go for an extra round

Beep test (20meters)
-go until no one is left
Jog around test until all in

Marry abb circle for 3min.

MOLESKINE: Focker would rather run than participate in leg day. Works for a Guy defeated the beep test. Matador and Harry Caray honorable mention.

ANNOUNCEMENTS: Butterball run

COT: Prayers for Dale’s family and community as they deal with sudden loss. Reminder that life is fragile. Prayers for Pound Puppies family as his work travel picks up.

Call your mom it’s an EMOM

AO: cruelhall
Q: Tinkertoy
PAX: Donkey Hammer, Esposa, Accounts Receivable, Pedialyte, EZ-Go, Mistah Mistah, Belly up, Pound Puppy, Crab Cakes, Super Soaker, Peabody
FNGs: None
COUNT: 12
CONDITIONS: 80* Swamp Land

WARMUP: D Dog, U Dog, WMH, SSH, GMs, Arm Circles, Phelps, Mosey to grab coupon

THE THANG:
6 sets of 5 rounds (31min)
Down and back to start every round.
3 burpee buy in first round of each set.
1st round sets your target for remaining 4.
Stop at 10sec mark for rest each round if you don’t finish the round.

– Thruster with coupon
– Air squat
– Dry dock
– Sitting shoulder press with coupon
– Merkin
– WW1 with coupon

Keep up with number of rounds you miss your target.
Highest number of rounds missed group does that number of burpees.

5 SSHs / 10sec rest on repeat until all in

MOLESKINE: V-Q got spicy :hot_pepper:

ANNOUNCEMENTS: Overnight run challenge coming up. Sounds like a grat tim.

COT: Pound Puppy’s daughter. Belly Up’s mother. Esposa’s Mexico trip.

Final Round of the Goblet of Ice Trifecta – Same 11s format, new battlefield—92 steps of pain

AO: handsomizer
Q: Natural Ice
PAX: Old Maid, Donkey Hammer, Tinkertoy, Cuban Missile, Topanga, Freakonomics, EZ-Go, Betty Ford, Cowboy, Natural Ice, Pound Puppy
FNGs: None
COUNT: 10
Handsomizer – June 6, 2025

Conditions: Stairway to sweat

Warm-O-Rama:
Quick stretch and Side Straddle Hops

The Thang – Triforce of Courage: Third times a Charm

Same 11s format, new battlefield—92 steps of pain.
– Bottom of the stairs: Burpees
– Top of the stairs: WWI Sit-Ups
Each round required a new movement up or down the staircase:
1. Bear crawl
2. Bunny hop
3. Crawl bear down
4. Lunges
5. Crab walk down
6. Imperial walker walk
7. Sprint (plain run)
8. High knees
9. Side shuffle (touch both feet to each step)
10. Lieutenant Dan (lunge + squat combo)
This was a grind. Courage was earned one step at a time.

Moleskin:
This wrapped the Goblet of Ice Trifecta:
– :white_check_mark: Power – Titan
– :white_check_mark: Wisdom – Green Machine
– :white_check_mark: Courage – Handsomizer
Whether you hit all three or just one, thanks for showing up and leaving it all out there.

Announcements:
– Bomber vs Handsomizer Ultimate next Friday
– 4th of July convergence at Handsomizer (TBD)
– CSAUP in planning – teams of 5
SYITG,
Natural Ice

Slightly Stupid

AO: cruelhall
Q: Movin On Up
PAX: Mistah Mistah, Donkey Hammer, Accounts Receivable, EZ-Go, Focker, Esposa, Young and Restless, Pepsi, Pedialyte, Matador, Pound Puppy, Hit & Run
FNGs: 1 Hit & Run
COUNT: 13
CONDITIONS: Moist

WARMUP:

20 SSH
10 Imperial walkers
10 Hill Billy’s
willy mays
Indian run

THE THANG:

– Atomic Merkin/Drydock apocalypse together

– Playground partners:

1 runs down hill, bear crawls up to weed
2 swerkins

1 runs down hill, bear crawls up to weed
2 WFAGs

1 runs down hill, bear crawls up to weed
2 dips

1 runs down hill, bear crawls up to weed
2 low row on bars

SSH for 6, don’t stop moving

10 Burpee/pullup

ANNOUNCEMENTS:

4:13 Struggle is coming up in June for those interested

COT:

Thanks for letting me lead this morning and way to get after it. I feel like I could run through a wall right now! :facepunch:

Coupon Carry

AO: detention
Q: Focker
PAX: Deep State, Young and Restless, Pedialyte, Movin On Up, Average Size, EZ-Go, Esposa, Donkey Hammer, Topanga (Scott), Pound Puppy, Peabody
FNGs: None
COUNT: 12
CONDITIONS: Perfect

WARMUP: dynamic football warmup

THE THANG: grab large coupon for the group and mosey to bottom of bus loop.
One PAX goes backward up hill while others race to the top and do exercises while waiting. Then back to bottom and switch PAX
Navy seals
Burpees
Wall sit
Ww1
Inch worm merkins
Sit throughs
Flutter kicks
Deep squats
Dry docks
Slow heel drops
Diamond merkins

Mosey to playground and one PAX rifle carries coupon to top of ramp while other PAX work
Pull ups
Jump squats
Dips/skull crushers
Lunges
Navy seals

MOLESKINE: good solid work to loosen up our bodies for the week ahead. Good Mumblechatter, yet still difficult

ANNOUNCEMENTS: looking forward to Topanga (Scott) leadership and thank you Deep State!

COT: a call to appreciate the moments we have with our families because time is fleeting

Tabata Tabata

AO: detention
Q: Accounts Receivable
PAX: Donkey Hammer, Esposa, Accounts Receivable, Pedialyte, Deep State, Mistah Mistah, Cocktail, Peabody, Pepsi, Pound Puppy
FNGs: None
COUNT: 10
CONDITIONS:
Clear and 62

WARMUP:
Side straddle hops
Downward dog
Cobra
Yoga stretches
Imperial walkers
Hillbillies

THE THANG:
Que up the funk playlist (aka 80s porno tunes)

Mosey around baseball loop
Grab coupons and head to playground / grassy hill.

7s on the hill – atomic merks at the top / merkins at the bottom

Tabata round (50sec work / 10sec rest – 4 cycles)
Burpee pull ups
Curl to press
Iron crosses

Mosey back to parking lot
Sprints (atomic merkins) for 5 minutes

Mary:
5 min of round robin core exercises.

MOLESKINE:
Reminder to be intentional with our wives and our families. Engage each other and don’t be afraid to get vulnerable and ask emotional questions.

ANNOUNCEMENTS:
Cruelhall this Friday is moving to Handsomizer
.
COT:

Top 5’s

AO: cruelhall
Q: Focker
PAX: Mistah Mistah, Pedialyte, Young and Restless, Donkey Hammer, EZ-Go, Esposa, Pound Puppy
FNGs: None
COUNT: 8
CONDITIONS: pleasant and chilly

WARMUP: some mobility work

THE THANG: run to ag center hill loop
20 Alabama prom dates at bottom
Bear crawl up hill
20 ww1 at top
Run down
20 lunges
Bear crawl up hill
20 ww1
Run down
20 prisoner squats
Bear crawl up hill
20 ww1
Run down
20 burpees

Run back to school
70 merkins until all in

MOLESKINE: just some really great Mumblechatter exploring our Top 5 albums and later diverging into Top 5 movies.

ANNOUNCEMENTS: leanpax, Smokehouse mile time trial on Tuesday!

COT: prayers for those in California and NC amid natural disasters, prayers for EZ-Go traveling and family peace

25 Days of Christmas 2024

AO: detention
Q: Movin On Up
PAX: Deep State, Pedialyte, Mistah Mistah, EZ-Go, Pound Puppy
FNGs: None
COUNT: 6
CONDITIONS:
– Pure Christmas Joy with the tunes to match

WARMUP:

– 20 SSH
– Willy Mays Haze
– Right over Left
– Left over Right
– Quick warmup mozy

THE THANG:

Thang
– 1 is 1 for everything and adds as you go
– Under pavilion so change the sprint. Add each one
– SSH for the 6

25 Days of Christmas:

1 Sprint
2 body builders
3 diamond mercans
4 jump squats
5 jlos
6 big boys
7 burpees
8 WWIs
9 star jumps
10 Mike Tyson’s
11 mercans
12 American hammers
13 heel touches
14 lunges
15 dry docks
16 side squats
17 hill Billy’s
18 high knees
19 Alabama prom dates
20 air press
21 lbcs
22 mountain climbers
23 calf raises
24 imperial walkers
25 shoulder taps

– SSH for 6

ANNOUNCEMENTS:
– Lean Pax starting January!

Stages of Labor

AO: cruelhall
Q: Focker
PAX: EZ-Go, Fortran, Young and Restless, Pedialyte, Uncle Jerry, Donkey Hammer, Pound Puppy
FNGs: None
COUNT: 8

WARMUP: stretching to loosen our pelvis

THE THANG: in light of the impending birth of my second son, we wanted to experience what childbirth is like for our wives

Early labor
Dilation 0-6cm
1,2,3,4,5,6 8-count bodybuilders
“Alternate between resting and working to get labor going”
Contractions 5-30 min between each.
5 merkins, 5 prisoner squats, 10, 15, 20, 25, 30. Run between sets to rest

Active labor
“actively work through labor with your birthing team”
Dilation 6-8 cm
Every PAX takes turns doing 6,7,8 pull ups. PAX waiting are doing lt dans—>monkey humpers—>Alabama prom dates to “relax” between “contractions”

Transition
“Burpee coping method”
Contractions Every 2 minutes for 60-90 sec
Dilation 8-10 cm
8 burpees in 60 sec
9 burpees in 60 sec
10 burpees in 60 sec
1 minute low plank rest
8 burpees in 60 sec
9 burpees in 60 sec
10 burpees in 60 sec

Pushing stage!
“Keep breathing and work with your body, not against it”
Dilated 10 cm
10 parking lot sprints

Placenta delivery (the forgotten child)
10 burpees

MOLESKINE: I think we can all say to the mother’s of our children that we now know exactly what they went through. Lots of great mumblechatter and birth stories shared. This may have been my Sistine Chapel of workouts in terms on intentionality

ANNOUNCEMENTS: please see Slack for full breakdown

COT: prayers for Pound Puppies’ wife as she recovers from surgery. Young and Restless and his earnest desire for children (love the vulnerability in sharing something like that so thank you man)

Nobody said it was EZ (Go)

AO: detention
Q: EZ-Go
PAX: Average Size, Works for a Guy, Topanga, Mistah Mistah, Donkey Hammer, Grape, Accounts Receivable, Winona, EZ-Go, Pedialyte, Deep State, Movin On Up, Old Maid, Pound Puppy
FNGs: None
COUNT: 14
CONDITIONS:
Average August

WARMUP:
Broga Flow: cobra, downward dog, right hand right foot/right hand stretch upward, warrior 1, rinse and repeat on left side

THE THANG:
*grab a coupon

Block work:
50 – squats
40 – block rows
30 – block mercs
20 – triple arm killers
10 – 8 count bb
5 – bubkas
Repeat x2

CrossFit Lyon Workout :woman-lifting-weights::
5 rounds:
10 squat cleans
10 thrusters
10 burpee chest-to-bar pull-ups

Mary:
*Choose your own adventure
2 min 6 inches
20 WW1
1 min low plank
20 Supermans
20 WW1
20 1-leg Alabama prom dates

MOLESKINE:
Big crew, big sweat, big gainz!

ANNOUNCEMENTS:
cruelhall Convergence with handsomizer on Sept 6 at Geodis
gullivers-travels-challenge is alive and well

COT:
Kids back in school, prayers for new school year
Praise for Average Size new job!