Green Machine

Date: 2026-04-23 AO: Green Machine Q: Focker , PAX: Young and Restless, Squatter, Esposa, bluemule, Focker, EZ-Go, SalPal, Horizon, Pep, Topanga (Scott), Cowboy, Wham-O, moneyshot, Andrew McDermott, Pepsi, Swig, Matador, Black Lung, Pedialyte, Puzzlah, Betty Ford, SquareD FNGs: None COUNT: 22 CONDITIONS: chill in the air that gave way to dripping sweat
WARMUP: walking from your car
THE THANG: 400m burpee broad jump, 400m lunges, 400m bear crawl, 400m run
MOLESKINE: everyone can’t wait for next year. I’ll make sure to give the countdown weekly
ANNOUNCEMENTS: Murder Mile in 365 days
COT: laughing and hugging and holding hands
PLAYLIST: Cowboy with the assist

Detention

Date: 2026-04-13 AO: Detention Q: Focker , PAX: Swig, Movin On Up, Average Size, EZ-Go, Michael Freiburg, Pedialyte, Tinkertoy, Esposa, Focker, Topanga (Scott) FNGs: None COUNT: 10 CONDITIONS:
WARMUP:
THE THANG:
MOLESKINE:
ANNOUNCEMENTS:
COT:
PLAYLIST:

Middle Tooth

Date: 2026-04-07 AO: Middle Tooth Q: Focker , PAX: Pepsi, Tinkertoy, Esposa, Focker, DrRupp, Matador, Betty Ford, Toothless, Pep, Topanga (Scott), sooner FNGs: None COUNT: 11 CONDITIONS: perfect for what we had ahead of us
WARMUP: stretches and a jog
THE THANG: “Killer B’s” Broad Jump 10 yards, do 10 burpees, 10 Bonnie Blairs (jump lunges) and 10 Big Boi situps. Broad Jump 10 yards, do 10 burpees, 10 Bonnie Blairs (jump lunges) and 10 Big Boi situps. Broad Jump 10 yards, do 10 burpees, 10 Bonnie Blairs (jump lunges) and 10 Big Boi situps. Bear crawl back 30 yards.
Did this for 5 rounds
MOLESKINE: Everyone kept talking about much fun this was and wanted a longer version where the exercises were continuous. Maybe in a mile format perhaps
ANNOUNCEMENTS: -impossible mile April 23 – Matador doing his own Plankpril – March into May step challenge
COT: -illnesses and deaths -tolerating family -job interview for my M
PLAYLIST: “B” related songs

You’ve all received detention – attendance is mandatory.

Date: 2026-03-30 AO: Detention Q: Young and Restless , PAX: Young and Restless, Uncle Jerry, Esposa, Tinkertoy, tampalibra, Pedialyte, Movin On Up, Topanga (Scott), Peabody, Rainman, Todo FNGs: None COUNT: 11 CONDITIONS: Absolutely perfect
WARMUP: SSH, various stretches
THE THANG: Jeopardy & Merkins!
Arm circles – explain the day:
– On this day, March 30th in 1964, “Answers and Questions” first reached TV screens with the debut of this long-running game show. – What is Jeopardy!?
Responses must be in the form of a question!
10 merkins for each question. Wrong answers receive 5 additional merkins. 3 wrong answers max.
During all questions, keep moving…
– Born on 4th of July in Slab Fork, WV, this soul singing American, had the sun shine on him for the last time at the age of 81 on this day in 2020. – Who is Bill Withers?
*Bill Withers playlist
Mosey to bottom of the hill, side of school. – Imperial Walkers
– Formally adopted on March 30, 1870, this amendment prohibited the denial of voting rights based on “race, color, or previous condition of servitude.” – What is the 15th Amendment?
Merkins
20 squats Bernie to the top of the hill 20 Iron Mikes (10 each leg)
Hillbillies
– In 1858, Hyman Lipman patented a new version of this writing tool, finally including an eraser on one end. – What is a pencil?
Merkins
Mosey to pavilion – hold squat
– This U.S. President was wounded outside a Washington, D.C. hotel by gunman John Hinckley Jr. – Who is Ronald Reagan? Merkins
Benches – step up to the top and squat – 20 times
Leg kicks – touch toes
– Later that same day in 1981, he was awarded Most Outstanding Player, when his team, coached by Bobby Knight, defeated the Tar Heels in the NCAA Men’s Basketball National Championship. – Who is Isiah Thomas?
Merkins
Mosey to the bottom of the field.
SSH
– Dr. Crawford Long made medical history in 1842 by being the first to use this substance as a surgical anesthetic. – What is ether?
Merkins
Bear crawl to the playground.
Rest during question
– This 1867 land deal with Russia was mocked as “Seward’s Folly” until gold was discovered there decades later. – What is the Alaska Purchase?
Merkins
10 pullups
Monkey humpers
– On March 30th 2001, this American swimmer became the youngest man, aged 15 years, 9 months, to set a world record in the US World Championship trials in Austin Texas. – Who is Michael Phelps
Merkins
Mosey to the top of the path by front of school
High knees
– These musicians don’t have much in common, but Celine Dion, Eric Clapton, Thomas Rhett, and MC Hammer all share this. – What is a March 30th Birthday?
Merkins
Rows on the bars – 20
– Also born on March 30th, this Dutch artist shares a strange commonality with Evander Holyfield and the Roman soldier in the Garden of Gethsemane. – Who is Vincent Van Gogh
Merkins
Wall sit
– In 2017, this aerospace company made history by successfully reflashing an orbital-class rocket for the first time. – What is SpaceX?
Merkins
– Established as a U.S. territory on March 30, 1822, this future “Sunshine State” was formerly a Spanish possession. – What is Florida?
Merkins
Mosey to start
Waaay too much time left. Each pax asked a random trivia question, merkins, sprint, jog back.
Tinkertoy got all 300 merkins in, not certain about everyone else.
ANNOUNCEMENTS: Impossible mile coming up, check slack.
COT: Tinkertoy wife’s friend Mia – daughter Lyla had full body seizure.
Holy Week & Easter
PLAYLIST: Bill Withers
https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2wUOJ3QMOz7WDBxd8f3MvN?si=2IymBZ2nQe28VyVMKp3W3w&pt=994972a3006cadcaa06c868a232d1be5&pi=P-C0mWulQlC-W

Boogie Wonderland at MiddleTooth

Date: 2026-02-10 AO: middle-tooth Q: Cowboy PAX: DrRupp, Toothless, sooner, Pepsi, Betty Ford, Topanga (Scott) FNGs: None COUNT: 7 CONDITIONS: High 40s, almost balmy in comparison to recent outings.
WARMUP: Easing in with some Bro-ga, we did all of the things: downward Dog, Cobra, reaching for the sky et al. Then some SSH with a double-time at the finish. Slow and Low Squats with emphasis on both Slow and Low. And finally some intros to JumpShots and Cowboy GiddyUps.
THE THANG: Choose Pairs and Mosey to the back of school Dock. 1. Pairs do 50 Total of Mike Tysons with partner jumping on the dock and down to run the circle loop. FlipFlop R&R with Jump Shots, R&R with Mike Tysons again this time to 30 2. 11s at the Front of School GiggyUps at the bottom – Iron Mike at the top – Partners start on opposite ends With 5 Slap Merkins in the middle when you meet your partner Mary: Supine Planks, WW1 MOLESKINE: Grateful was the word of the day that stuck out.
ANNOUNCEMENTS: Holy Smokes 2/19
COT: Gaze at the moon and acknowledge how small we are in a great expanse AND yet chased down by a Maker.
PLAYLIST: Cowboy’s High School Playlist. Most all by Cover Bands. Of course when YHC was in high school there was no such thing as a playlist. We called it a Mix Tape. music.apple.com/us/playlist/middletooth2026/pl.u-leyll88cxgZkbN

12 Days of Christmas

AO: detention
Q: Focker
PAX: Deep State, Esposa, Topanga (Scott), Accounts Receivable, Matador, Movin On Up, Pedialyte, Harry Caray, Andrew McDermott, Michael Freiburg, Kraut, Florida Man
FNGs: 1 Florida Man
COUNT: 13
CONDITIONS: cold cold cold

WARMUP: stretches, snow angels, toy soldiers, reindeer run

THE THANG:
1 curl with descending/lift the kid to bed
2 thrusters lift the trees
3 sit ups with bag
4 pull throughs/slide the box
5 squats/lift the box
6 crunchy frogs
7 overhead presses/lift the kid
8 squats
9 flutters
10 descending merkins/fill the sweater
11 lunges fill the pants
12 120 plank

Followed by 3 sprints and some gut work

MOLESKINE: FNG Paul getting out after Butterball Crawl. Excellent job Pedialyte and EZ-Go on the connection!

ANNOUNCEMENTS: 51 weeks for us to brainstorm on Butterball Crawl improvements and advertising

COT: prayers for Andrew McDermott friend and Harry Caray mother.

HAIL HYDRA

AO: greenmachine
Q: Natural Ice , Chunks, Squatter
PAX: Pep, Esposa, SalPal, Grape, Topanga (Scott), Focker, Cowboy, Young and Restless, Hipster, Wham-O, Betty Ford
FNGs: None
COUNT: 13
CONDITIONS: Low 40s and perfect

WARMUP: NO SSH FOR YOU Pep!!!
Why warm up when you can run to the track :man-shrugging:

THE THANG: The 3 Heads of Hydra

Squatter kicked off the first 15 minutes with a simple and effective concept

Start at 0m
10 merkins, 10 burpee broad jumps, 10 air squats, 10 lunges, 10 flutter kicks, bear crawl to the 100m line, run the rest of the track (picking up the 6), and rinse and repeat.

YHC took over at 5:45

Starting at the end of the field with performed 30 SSH – (My psyop to get the full PAX into cadence was a complete failure)
10 8-count body builders, 20 Big Boy Sit Ups and we ran to the other side of the field to rinse and repeat.

Now that we are over Ocotburpee, 8 count body builders are all the rage.

Lastly Chunks closed us out.
Sprints up the hill, sets of Perfect Merkins, Burpees :pinched_fingers: the perfect way to close out a beat down before ending with some light stretching.

MOLESKINE: IMHO – Co Qs should be about keeping the momentum high and not planning to much as team. Mission accomplished

ANNOUNCEMENTS: Percy Warner Accent this Saturday, f3 Afterhours/Afterdark/NightF3 next Thursday, Turkey Trot in Crieve Hall, Grow School in December

COT: Prayers for the Clay Family, Lifting up Hipster, and for all of us to lean into community as we are not built to grow/thrive on our own.

I am thankful for you guys!
-Natty Out

All typos courtesy of me writing this out and not using Chatgpt

123 Burpee

AO: detention
Q: Esposa
PAX: Uncle Jerry, Pedialyte, Focker, Grape, Donkey Hammer, Andrew McDermott, Harry Caray, Young and Restless, Accounts Receivable, Matador, Fortran, EZ-Go, Topanga (Scott)
FNGs: None
COUNT: 14
CONDITIONS: very crisp

WARMUP: Broga followed by burpee Apocalypse

THE THANG: Deck of Cards
:clubs: lung 2=1
:hearts: Arods= j-low with a pickle pounder
:diamonds:Superman’s
:spades: Merkins
Aces. 11 burpees plus the work out

MOLESKINE: get it

ANNOUNCEMENTS: 2.0 work out, Crieve Hall Butter Ball Crawl

COT: Prayer

Stages of Labor

AO: middle-tooth
Q: Focker
PAX: Pepsi, Esposa, Matador, DrRupp, Topanga (Scott), Betty Ford, Choo Choo, Pole Dancer, Matt Lanahan
FNGs: None
COUNT: 10
CONDITIONS: heat thunder

WARMUP: nahhh

THE THANG: today we learned about the stages of labor to get children into this world

Early labor
Dilation 0-6cm
1,2,3,4,5,6 8-count bodybuilders
“Alternate between resting and working to get labor going”
Contractions 5-30 min 15-45 sec
5 merkins, 5 prisoner squats, 10, 15, 20, 25, 30. Run between sets to rest

Active labor
“actively work through labor with your birthing team”
“Birth affirmations”
Dilation 6-8 cm
Every PAX does 6,7,8 pull ups while everyone affirms them. PAX are doing leg pumps—>monkey humpers—>prom dates to “relax” between “contractions”

Transition
“Burpee coping method”
Contractions Every 2 minutes for 60-90 sec
Dilation 8-10 cm
8 burpees in 60 sec
9 burpees in 60 sec
10 burpees in 60 sec
1 minute plank
8 burpees in 60 sec
9 burpees in 60 sec
10 burpees in 60 sec

Pushing stage!
“Keep breathing and work with your body, not against it”
Dilated 10 cm
Contractions 3-5 min lasting 30 sec
2 sprints with small la mazze breathing session

Placenta delivery
Core work

MOLESKINE: I think we all left today realizing labor is just like F3, maybe even a little more difficult

ANNOUNCEMENTS: check slack

COT: May we all appreciate and recognize our mortality and the small blessings in this life

Coupon Carry

AO: detention
Q: Focker
PAX: Deep State, Young and Restless, Pedialyte, Movin On Up, Average Size, EZ-Go, Esposa, Donkey Hammer, Topanga (Scott), Pound Puppy, Peabody
FNGs: None
COUNT: 12
CONDITIONS: Perfect

WARMUP: dynamic football warmup

THE THANG: grab large coupon for the group and mosey to bottom of bus loop.
One PAX goes backward up hill while others race to the top and do exercises while waiting. Then back to bottom and switch PAX
Navy seals
Burpees
Wall sit
Ww1
Inch worm merkins
Sit throughs
Flutter kicks
Deep squats
Dry docks
Slow heel drops
Diamond merkins

Mosey to playground and one PAX rifle carries coupon to top of ramp while other PAX work
Pull ups
Jump squats
Dips/skull crushers
Lunges
Navy seals

MOLESKINE: good solid work to loosen up our bodies for the week ahead. Good Mumblechatter, yet still difficult

ANNOUNCEMENTS: looking forward to Topanga (Scott) leadership and thank you Deep State!

COT: a call to appreciate the moments we have with our families because time is fleeting