Backblasts

Date: 2026-05-28 AO: The Knoll Q: Sooie , PAX: Sooie, Pebbles, AAA, morning stār, The Banker, Malibu, Bumblebee (2.0) FNGs: None COUNT: 7 CONDITIONS: ““All the heaven seemed covered with a quite vivid and palpable plumage; you could only say that the sky was full of feathers…” — G.K. Chesterton” And verily, beneath such an empyrean did seven sojourning souls assemble for the morning’s labor. The sky hung draped in impossible colors: violet, mauve, pale green, and faint blushes of red spilling upward from the eastern horizon. The kind of dawn that almost convinces a man to become poetic against his will. Naturally, we began with the disclaimer: the sacred legal incantation shielding the Q from responsibility for any questionable life choices about to unfold.
WARMUP: We opened in the grand F3 tradition with Side Straddle Hops. Unfortunately, YHC briefly forgot how cadence functions and nearly resigned in disgrace as the PAX began chuckling at the unfolding numerical catastrophe. Order was restored before mutiny could take hold. – Side Straddle Hops – Walkout Merkins x3 – Low Slow Squats x10 – Imperial Walkers x10
Then came: Shoulders Into Boulders / Keep ‘Em Up / Freed to Lead The PAX rotated through arm and shoulder exercises, calling cadence for 10 reps apiece until either creativity or musculature failed us. Included among the torment: – BAC – BBAC – Shoulder Taps – Air Presses – Moroccan Night Clubs – Put the Glasses On – Seal Claps – Overhead Claps By this point the shoulders were sufficiently awakened.
THE THANG: Now fully prepared, we commenced the trials of Charles Sanders Baggins. One PAX at a time selected an exercise for the group to AMRAP while he proceeded to repeatedly hurl a sandbag approximately 28 yards across the playground in a variety of increasingly questionable fashions. The throw variations included: – Clean → Press → Full Body Chuck – Battering Ram Chuck (Right Side) – Battering Ram Chuck (Left Side) – Kettlebell “Granny” Chuck
Just as we were about to commence morning stār added a mosey to his warmup. Jogging back to his house to retrieve Bumblebee’s sandbag since the 60# behemoth would’ve proven to be unwieldy. He returned in time to participate in the first round of chucks.
As one might expect, chaos blossomed quickly. Merkins accumulated. Squats multiplied. WW2s were inflicted with reckless abandon. Shoulders deteriorated. Grip strength evaporated. And lo, no muscle group escaped taxation.
MARY: Having thrown sandbags to our hearts’ content and our rotator cuffs’ dismay, we concluded with a Ring of Fire up to five merkins. Then finally, one minute of deliberate breath work.
MOLESKINE: Reflected on meaning in the midst of futility…maybe.
ANNOUNCEMENTS: Summer Bash TBD
COT: Prayer’s lifted. Sooie Brewie flowed once again. Enjoyed the post workout mumblechatter as The Banker shared his newly discovered passion for bird finding. Reminded me of a post/quote I came across: “As you age, it’s ridiculous how fast bird-watching creeps up on you. You spend your whole life being pretty indeifferent to birds…and then one day you’re like: “Dang, if i’m not mistaken, that’s a yellow-rumped warbler””